See Coach Ben’s face in the picture above? This is how I feel after watching it Yellowjackets Season 2 finale. It’s been a long, long time since I’ve felt this upset about a TV show. It’s been a long time since something went from so good to absolutely terrible so quickly. I’m Ben’s sad face. I am his disappointment. And like Ben in the final moments of ‘Storytelling’ I want to burn this show to the ground.

I don’t even want to summarize. Honestly, I’m not sure this episode deserves a recap. Here’s what I hated about this finale — a finale that I hated as much as I loved the season one finale.

In the current timeline, everything is tied up in a beautiful, perfect, absolutely impossible bow. Just after all the women have gathered on Lottie’s iconic turf, Walter shows up. And then Jeff and Callie. And then two detectives, Kevin and Mustache. They all show up just a little while before Lottie and the ladies have their little hunting ceremony. How terribly convenient! Callie has a gun, so when Shauna pulls out the queen and all the women, bizarrely, decide to actually hunt her, we know callie will show up in no time. And she does it!

Walter kills Kevin with poison. I said, when he gave him the hot cocoa, “I wonder how much poison he put in the hot chocolate?” Shocking! He also manages to convince Mustache – in about ten seconds – that he has a load of dirt on Kevin that makes it look like he killed Adam Martin. How convenient!

Hey, here’s the game: every time something really cool happens in this episode, have a drink. You’ll be throwing up by the time it starts. Just writing makes me sick.

All of my regular readers know that I was one of the biggest champions of this show in season 1. It made my list of the best shows of 2022. I told anyone who would listen to watch it. I watched the first season three fucking times!

My heart is broken. Finally, after Callie shoots Lottie, after their stupid, ridiculous, horribly rushed hunting ceremony, Lisa shows up with a shotgun (how convenient!) and threatens to shoot Natalie because, for some reason, Natalie pulls out a knife at that very moment (how convenient!) Misty has a poison needle with her (how convenient!) and chases after Lisa, but Nat stands in her way and takes the needle instead, dying moments later. This is supposed to be contrasted with her letting Javi die, like paying some kind of penance or something, but that’s ridiculous. Funniest TV death since Eddie friggin’ Munson.

Look, I hate to say this, but the writers of this show have lost their thread. They obviously don’t understand their show! Nat was a hero. Now we literally have no one to root for, which is one of the five biggest problems I laid out for this show in my article yesterday even before I found out what happened to her.

What a spectacular fall from grace. Much faster, much more brutal than Lost’s refuse.

In the past timeline they slaughter Javi and Ben sees it happening and decides to set the cabin on fire. I was basically cheering at this point. If only he had succeeded. I guess there’s still one person to root for, but I don’t like Ben’s chances any more than I like this show’s chances for any sort of satisfying third season.

They eat Javi and Lottie is basically fully recovered by the time the meat is cooked. She tells them that Nat is their leader now, because the Wild wouldn’t let them kill her bla bla bla. I’m not sure what else to say. Travis took a bite of his brother’s raw heart before tossing it onto the pan. I guess that’s all settled. How convenient!

This was a bad episode of TV, not just a disappointing episode Yellowjackets. Fictional plot lines. Neat and tidy. It’s like they were in a hurry to wrap up all the threads they screwed up. The cops plot was bad and was handled in the coolest and funniest way imaginable. Walter is just a walk deus ex machina. Lottie was taken to a mental hospital. Nat is dead. Shauna is single. Who knows or cares where is some of their story going? Are they done with the modern timeline now? It didn’t go anywhere. We didn’t learn anything about Tai or the Eyeless Man. Nat basically is nothing the whole season before his death.

The past story is still tiring. The butchering of Javi was too grotesque and grim for my taste, and I have a strong stomach for this stuff. I’m just terribly, terribly disappointed and I can’t imagine any fan of the first season watching this and thinking “Oh yeah, this was satisfying and good!” but then, i’m always shocked by people.

0/10. F-. Two thumbs down. What a bloody awful shame. Here’s hope Success hold the landing. Honestly, I’d be shocked if it wasn’t. And maybe Barry it will pass. I’m a little suspicious. I’ll be writing about both series finales here on this blog, so stay tuned.

What did you think about Yellowjackets Season 2 finale? Let me know further Twitter or Facebook.

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PS My daughter was even more nervous than me after watching this episode. She talked about it for a long time, angrily. She yelled at the TV during the episode. We are not happy. I’m not happy at all.